Tuesday, September 15, 2015

Spicy Jokes - 24 Hours To Live

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Yo Momma.. - Yo Momma Jokes


Yo momma is like a door..she's always getting slammed

 

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24 Hours To Live - Marriage Jokes


Ralph returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours to live.

Given this prognosis, Ralph asks his wife for sex. Naturally, she agrees, and they make love.

About six hours later, the husband goes to his wife and says, "Honey, you know I now have only 18 hours to live. Could we please do it one more time?" Of course, the wife agrees and they do it again.

Later, as the man gets into bed, he looks at his watch and realizes he now has only 8 hours left. He touches his wife's shoulder and asks, "Honey, please... just one more time before I die?" She says, "Of course, dear. "And they make love for the third time.

After this session, the wife rolls over & falls asleep. Ralph, however, worried about his impending death, tosses & turns until he's down to 4 more hours. He taps his wife, who rouses. "Honey, I have only 4 more hours. Do you think we could.....?"

At this point the wife sits up and says, "Listen Ralph, I have to get up in the morning...You don't."

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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com

Relish - #1463

Relish - v. to derive or receive pleasure from; get enjoyment from; take pleasure in

 


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A Joke A Day - Driving Trends

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Choir Rehearsal - Musician Jokes


The choir had just come out of rehearsal.

“Am I to assume that you do a lot of singing at home?” Mr. Harris asked a fellow choir member, David Grey.

“Yes, I sing a lot. I use my voice just to kill time,” said David.

Mr. Harris nodded, “You certainly have a fine weapon.”

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Driving Trends - Miscellaneous Jokes

Chicago: One hand on wheel, one hand on horn.

New York: One hand on wheel, one finger out window.

New Jersey: One hand on wheel, one finger out window, cutting across all lanes of traffic.

Boston: One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, foot solidly on accelerator.

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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com

Stuck drinking glasses? - #5020

Fill the top glass with cold water and dip the bottom glass in hot water. Wait a few seconds and pull the top glass away.

 


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