A Joke A Day - A frog walks into a bank...

Musical Pigs - Animal Jokes What do you call a group of musical pigs? An oinkestra! Scroll down for Today's Joke

A frog walks into a bank... - Animal Jokes A frog walks into a bank, and approaches the teller. He sees the tellers name tag read Paddy Black and says "I'd like to take out a loan, Mrs. Black" "Certainly," says the teller, "how much would that be for?" "One million dollars." replies the frog. "Don't worry, it's ok, I know the manager." The teller is understandably taken aback by this, and asks if the frog has any collateral to cover this. "As a matter of fact, I do!" says the frog, and he reaches into his pocket and hands over a tiny ceramic elephant. "What?!" says the teller, "This is garbage! I can't take this!" "Well, take it up with my father then!" The frog retorts. "Oh yeah, and who might that be?" The teller is quickly getting more and more annoyed at the frog. "Why, it's Keith Richards!" The frog is waiting impatiently, tapping his toe on the ground. "Now, can I have that loan or not?" "Wait right here" the teller says, as she storms into the back room, looking for her manager. "There's a frog out there who claims to know you, and wants a million dollar loan. He claims his father his Keith Richards! He even gave me this as collateral," she says, holding up the elephant. "I mean, what even is this?" The manager takes a look at the elephant and replies "It's a knick knack, Paddy Black, give the frog a loan. His old man's a rolling stone!" Scroll down for Today's Tip of The Day

The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com Famous Quote - Quote - #531 "99% of failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses." - George Washington Carver

www.AJokeADay.com 999 E Touhy Ave, Des Plaines, IL 60018 1995-2015 © All rights reserved. Unsubscribe here

A Joke A Day - Anything I Can Do?

Thirteen! - Miscellaneous Jokes A guy is passing a Mental Hospital surrounded by a wall and he hears the chanting inside, Thirteen! Thirteen! Thirteen! Curious to see what's going on he finds a small hole in the wall, so he bends and peeks inside. Someone inside pokes him hard in the eye and everyone starts inside chanting, Fourteen! Fourteen! Fourteen! Scroll down for Today's Joke

Anything I Can Do? - Elderly Jokes A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few things when he noticed an old lady following him around. Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally he went to the checkout line, but she got in front of him. "Pardon me," she said, "I'm sorry if my staring at you has made you feel uncomfortable. It's just that you look just like my son, who just died recently." "I'm very sorry," replied the young man, "is there anything I can do for you?" "Yes," she said, "As I'm leaving, can you say 'Good bye, Mother'? It would make me feel so much better." "Sure," answered the young man. As the old woman was leaving, he called out, "Goodbye, Mother!" As he stepped up to the checkout counter, he saw that his total was $127.50. "How can that be?" He asked, "I only purchased a few things!" "Your mother said that you would pay for her," said the clerk. Scroll down for Today's Tip of The Day

The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com Love Quotes - Path to Truth - #161 "There is no path to truth, it must come to you. Truth can come to you only when your mind and heart are simple, clear, and there is love in your heart; not if your heart is filled with the things of the mind." J. Krishnamurti

www.AJokeADay.com 999 E Touhy Ave, Des Plaines, IL 60018 1995-2015 © All rights reserved. Unsubscribe here

Your confirmation is needed

Please reply to this email message to confirm your subscription to
jokes2u.com.

Your email address has been entered for a subscription to the
jokes2u.com mailing list. However, your new subscription requires
a confirmation that you received this email message and want
to join this mailing list.

If you do not want to join, do nothing. You will be automatically
removed.

To confirm that you do want to join, simply reply to this message.
Make sure that your message is addressed to
ListManager-confirm-154559F@lyris.PrecisionComputers.com

To unsubscribe immediately, you send an email message to
leave-jokes2u.com-154559F@lyris.PrecisionComputers.com