Monday, November 25, 2013

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - 25th November, 2013

JokesWareHouse.com Joke of the day - 25th November, 2013 - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

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Motorhome
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A blonde goes into a coffee shop and notices there's
a "peel and win" sticker on her coffee cup.

So she peels it off and starts screaming, "I've won a motorhome!
I've won a motorhome!"


The waitress says, "That's impossible.
The biggest prize is a free Lunch.?"


But the blonde keeps on screaming,
"I've won a motorhome! I've won a motorhome!"



Finally, the manager comes over and says,
"Ma'am, I'm sorry, but you're mistaken.

You couldn't have possibly won a motorhome
because we didn't have that as a prize.



The blonde says, "No, it's not a mistake.
I've won a motorhome!"



And she hands the ticket to the
manager and HE reads...




"W I N A B A G E L"






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Bar & Drinking Jokes :: #23037
By Anonymous from USA.

A shy but drunk young man walks over to a beautiful girl in a bar and says, "Do you mind if I ask you a personal question?" "Well actually, I do," she says, "but I'm sure you are going to ask me anyway." "How many men have you slept with?" "That's my business!" "Interesting! I didn't realize you made your living at it!"


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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
Famous Quote :: #1286
By SURYA KUMAR MISRA from NEW DELHI India

Basis of achieving BIG.
The starting point of all achievements is desire.

Weak desire brings weak results.

Just a small amount of fire makes a small amount of heat.

Napoleon Hill

 
 
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The Joke of The Day
Marriage Jokes :: #23557
By Anonymous from USA.

A couple is arguing about who should make the coffee in the morning. The wife says, "I think your should do it because you get up first."

He counters with, "The kitchen is your domain, and you do all the cooking so you know where everything is. I think you should make the coffee." "No way," she says. "You should do it. The Bible even says so." "What the heck are you talking about?" She grabs the family Bible, thumbs through, and point to the appropriate section: "Hebrews"




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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
One-Liners :: #3474
By Walt Haskins from Lahaina. Hawaii USA.

WHAT DOESN'T NEED IRRIGATION
Alcohol is the irrigation that problems use to grow and multiply.

 
 
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Sunday, November 24, 2013

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - 24th November, 2013

JokesWareHouse.com Joke of the day - 24th November, 2013 - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

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Sarcastic Remarks For Work
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And your crybaby whinny opinion would be...?

This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.

I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

If I throw a stick, will you leave?

If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on my
cats.

Does your train of thought have a caboose?

Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

A PBS mind in an MTV world.

Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.

Suburbia: where they tear out the trees & then name streets after them.

Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.

See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.

Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.

A woman's favorite position is CEO.

I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't fallen asleep
yet.

Can I trade this job for what's behind door number 1?

I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.

Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

Macho Law prohibits me from admitting I'm wrong.

Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?

Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.

I plead contemporary insanity.

How do I set a laser printer to stun?

Meandering to a different drummer.

I majored in liberal arts. Will that be for here or to go?





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Animal Jokes :: #23085
By Anonymous from USA.

A frog called the Psychic hotline and was told, 'you are going to meet a beautiful young woman who will want to know everything about you.' The frog said; that's great! Will I meet her at a party, or what?' 'No replied the psychic. 'Next semester in biology class'


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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
Miscellaneous :: #3255
By R.RAMACHANDRA RAO from HYDERABAD India

Political jokes
The problem with the political jokes

is they get elected!

- HENRY CAIN -

 
 
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The Joke of The Day
Military Jokes :: #23681
By Anonymous from USA.

The sergeant-major growled at the young soldier: "I didn't see you at camouflage training this morning."

"Thank you very much, sir."




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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
Words of Knowledge :: #613
By David Nkedive from Madrid Spain

MONEY
Money is neither good nor bad, the results of your use of it will determine its usefulness.

 
 
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