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Women Jokes :: #821 By arty@baboucha.com from United Kingdom TWO NEW ADDITIONS TO THE PERIODIC TABLE OF ELEMENTS Element Name: WOMANIUM Symbol: WO Atomic Weight: (don't even go there) Physical properties: Generally soft and round in form. Boils at nothing and may freeze any time. Melts when treated properly. Very bitter if not used well. Chemical properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Violent when left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green when placed next to a better specimen. Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known. Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands! Element Name: MANIUM Symbol: XY Atomic Weight: (180 +/ - 50) Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples. Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with KD (Element: CHILDIUM) for prolonged period of time. Neuralize by saturating with alcohol. Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good samples are able to produce large quantities on command. Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell Forward this joke to your friends >>   Fitness :: #367 By Jenny Henderson from Omaha USA. Yoga videos In choosing a yoga exercise video the most important thing is to check the instructor´s qualifications. Just like live instructors, each has their good points and bad points. Also, try viewing the video before you buy it, because you can find good and inexpensive videos that are made to suit your needs. Finally, try using the tapes as a supplement to live practice, but if you do not have any local classes be sure to get a beginner´s tape.     SpicyJokes.com - www.spicyjokes.com 999 E Touhy Ave, Des Plaines, IL 60018 1995-2011 © All rights reserved. Unsubscribe from SpicyJokes.com sent to dailyjokes@inspiredgfx.com