In the pre-Thanksgiving rush, we have received an early weather report
from our in-house weather reporters. This is one you should be sure to
email to your Mom. Turkeys will thaw in the morning, then warm in the
oven to an afternoon high near 190F. The kitchen will turn hot and
humid, and if you bother the cook, be ready for a severe squall or cold
shoulder.
During the late afternoon and evening, the cold front of a knife will
slice through the turkey, causing an accumulation of one to two inches
on plates. Mashed potatoes will drift across one side, while cranberry
sauce creates slippery spots on the other. Please pass the gravy.
A weight watch and indigestion warning have been issued for the entire
area, with increased stuffiness around the beltway. During the evening,
the turkey will diminish and taper off to leftovers, dropping to a low
of 34F in the refrigerator.
Looking ahead to Friday and Saturday, high pressure to eat sandwiches
will be established. Flurries of leftovers can be expected both days
with a 50 percent chance of scattered soup late in the day. We expect a
warming trend where soup develops. By early next week, eating pressure
will be low as the only wish left will be the bone.
Quickies:
How do you know your family is dysfunctional?
If Thanksgiving Dinner consists of Wild Turkey instead of roasted
turkey!
What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?
If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!
What sound does a space turkey make?
Hubble, Hubble, Hubble!
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