JokesWareHouse.com Joke of the day - 31st January, 2013 - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com
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Grandma's Boyfriend
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A 5-year old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. While playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting furniture, he looked up and said, "Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend?" Grandma replied, "Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can set in my bedroom and watch it all day long. The TV evangelists keep me company and make me feel so good.
The comedies make me laugh. I'm so happy with my TV as my boyfriend." Grandma turned on the TV and the picture was horrible. She started adjusting the knobs trying to get the picture in focus. Frustrated, she started hitting on the backside of the TV hoping to fix the problem. The little boy heard the doorbell ring so he hurried to open the door.
When he opened the door, there stood Grandma's minister. The minister said, "Hello son is your grandma home?"
The little boy replied, "Yeah, she's in the bedroom bangin' her boyfriend."
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Thursday, January 31, 2013
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Clean Joke of the Day
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Howdy Daily, it's me, Joe Cosity here!
A local radio announcer commenting on hazardous driving conditions:
"Please don't do any unnecessary driving unless it's absolutely necessary."
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"And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment." - Hebrews 9:27
We have only one life, so we need to spend it all wisely!
I'm glad you could join me for today's content, and I look
forward to bringing you more next time!
Until then, bye-bye!
Joe Cosity
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Clean Joke of the Day is a ministry supported by faith. You can be a part of this ministry too, through prayer and financial giving. Simply mail your comments or gifts to the following address:
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Email: joe@christfocus.com
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Clean Joke of the Day exists to proclaim the truth of God, Jesus Christ, through emotional encouragement and spiritual exhortation.
Reminder: Joe Cosity is only a fictitious person, the result of imagination. Therefore, events depicted in this newsletter as real are actually either partially or completely made up to help you laugh. To contact Joe, simply send an email to:
joe@christfocus.com
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Clean Joke of the Day is never sent unsolicited. Your email address is receiving this communication because you visited http://cleanjokeoftheday.com and manually signed up for this communication, or someone else has manually subscribed you (that's not good:)
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receive clean, Christ honoring humor simply by visiting
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************************************************************
Howdy Daily, it's me, Joe Cosity here!
A local radio announcer commenting on hazardous driving conditions:
"Please don't do any unnecessary driving unless it's absolutely necessary."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment." - Hebrews 9:27
We have only one life, so we need to spend it all wisely!
I'm glad you could join me for today's content, and I look
forward to bringing you more next time!
Until then, bye-bye!
Joe Cosity
P.S. If you wish to leave, please click here:
Not interested in receiving more? Click here:
http://www.clean-joke-of-the-day.net/mail/rem.php?u=e1b73fa
or visit http://www.cleanjokeoftheday.com
P.S. Jesus has a message for you: http://christfocus.com
Clean Joke of the Day is a ministry supported by faith. You can be a part of this ministry too, through prayer and financial giving. Simply mail your comments or gifts to the following address:
Clean Joke of the Day
4 NE 10th St, PMB #262
Oklahoma City, OK 73104
Phone: 405-200-1692
Web: http://www.cleanjokeoftheday.com
Email: joe@christfocus.com
***********************************************************
Clean Joke of the Day exists to proclaim the truth of God, Jesus Christ, through emotional encouragement and spiritual exhortation.
Reminder: Joe Cosity is only a fictitious person, the result of imagination. Therefore, events depicted in this newsletter as real are actually either partially or completely made up to help you laugh. To contact Joe, simply send an email to:
joe@christfocus.com
***********************************************************
Clean Joke of the Day is never sent unsolicited. Your email address is receiving this communication because you visited http://cleanjokeoftheday.com and manually signed up for this communication, or someone else has manually subscribed you (that's not good:)
Clean Joke of the Day is a recurring email that is sent 6 times every week. If you wish to leave this publication, please visit http://cleanjokeoftheday.com and type your email address into the subscribe form, select "remove"
from the drop down box, and click submit. Alternatively, you can also click on the remove link in the first P.S.
A Joke A Day - Funny everyday Jokes
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Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - 30th January, 2013
JokesWareHouse.com Joke of the day - 30th January, 2013 - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com
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Words of Wisdom
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People who live in glass houses should make love in the basement.
Never read the fine print.
There ain't no way you're going to like it.
If you let a smile be your umbrella,
then most likely your butt will get soaking wet.
The only two things we do with greater frequency
in middle age are urinate and attend funerals.
The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody
has the same size bucket.
To err is human, to forgive - highly unlikely.
Do you realize that in about 40 years,
we'll have thousands of old ladies
running around with tattoos?
Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable
to cry in a Porsche than in a Hyundai.
Drinking makes some husbands see double and feel single.
Living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.
After a certain age, if you don't wake up aching in every joint,
you are probably dead.
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Forward this joke to your friends! Or if you want to let them see this, give them this link: http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/cgi-bin/viewjoke.cgi?id=20130130
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-------------------------
Words of Wisdom
-------------------------
People who live in glass houses should make love in the basement.
Never read the fine print.
There ain't no way you're going to like it.
If you let a smile be your umbrella,
then most likely your butt will get soaking wet.
The only two things we do with greater frequency
in middle age are urinate and attend funerals.
The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody
has the same size bucket.
To err is human, to forgive - highly unlikely.
Do you realize that in about 40 years,
we'll have thousands of old ladies
running around with tattoos?
Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable
to cry in a Porsche than in a Hyundai.
Drinking makes some husbands see double and feel single.
Living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.
After a certain age, if you don't wake up aching in every joint,
you are probably dead.
-------------------------
Advertisements
-------------------------
Forward this joke to your friends! Or if you want to let them see this, give them this link: http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/cgi-bin/viewjoke.cgi?id=20130130
Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com
________________________________________________
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New Kroll Show tonight - Bobby Bottleservice, Ghost Bouncer
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Clean Joke of the Day
If this was forwarded to you, you can subscribe yourself and
receive clean, Christ honoring humor simply by visiting http://www.cleanjokeoftheday.com ************************************************************ Howdy Daily, it's me, Joe Cosity here! A wife was very disappointed and quite upset over her husband's forgetting her birthday. He diplomatically responded, "How do you expect me to remember your birthday when you never look any older?'" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love." - 1 John 4:18 Fear has no place in love. Bold confidence is based on love, cannot coexist with fear. Love, which, when perfected, gives bold confidence and casts out fear. The design of Christ's propitiatory death was to deliver from this bondage of fear. We are able to deal people effectively in a way that had no fear yet showing God's Love. I'm glad you could join me for today's content, and I look forward to bringing you more next time! Until then, bye-bye! Joe Cosity P.S. If you wish to leave, please click here: Not interested in receiving more? Click here: http://www.clean-joke-of-the-day.net/mail/rem.php?u=e1b73fa or visit http://www.cleanjokeoftheday.com P.S. Jesus has a message for you: http://christfocus.com Clean Joke of the Day is a ministry supported by faith. You can be a part of this ministry too, through prayer and financial giving. Simply mail your comments or gifts to the following address: Clean Joke of the Day 4 NE 10th St, PMB #262 Oklahoma City, OK 73104 Phone: 405-200-1692 Web: http://www.cleanjokeoftheday.com Email: joe@christfocus.com *********************************************************** Clean Joke of the Day exists to proclaim the truth of God, Jesus Christ, through emotional encouragement and spiritual exhortation. Reminder: Joe Cosity is only a fictitious person, the result of imagination. Therefore, events depicted in this newsletter as real are actually either partially or completely made up to help you laugh. To contact Joe, simply send an email to: joe@christfocus.com *********************************************************** Clean Joke of the Day is never sent unsolicited. Your email address is receiving this communication because you visited http://cleanjokeoftheday.com and manually signed up for this communication, or someone else has manually subscribed you (that's not good:) Clean Joke of the Day is a recurring email that is sent 6 times every week. If you wish to leave this publication, please visit http://cleanjokeoftheday.com and type your email address into the subscribe form, select "remove" from the drop down box, and click submit. Alternatively, you can also click on the remove link in the first P.S. A Joke A Day - Funny everyday Jokes
Tuesday, January 29, 2013Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - 29th January, 2013
JokesWareHouse.com Joke of the day - 29th January, 2013 - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com
------------------------- Devil in Church ------------------------- One bright, beautiful Sunday morning, everyone in the tiny town of Johnstown got up early and went to the local church. Before the service started, the townspeople were sitting in their pews and talking about their lives, their families, etc. Suddenly, the Devil himself appeared in front of the congregation. Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate. Soon everyone was evacuated from the church except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew, not moving, seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy was in his presence. Now this confused Satan a bit, so he walked up to the man and said, "Don't you know who I am?" The man replied, "Yep, sure do." Satan asked "Aren't you afraid of me?" "Nope, sure ain't," said the man. Satan was a little perturbed at this and queried, "Why aren't you afraid of me?" The man calmly replied, "I been married to your sister for 48 years." ------------------------- Advertisements ------------------------- Forward this joke to your friends! Or if you want to let them see this, give them this link: http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/cgi-bin/viewjoke.cgi?id=20130129 Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com ________________________________________________ To manage your account or to unsubscribe to our mailing list, go to http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/mailinglist.shtml Inside Amy Schumer: The Live Tour. Tickets available now!
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