Saturday, January 10, 2015

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Women Jokes :: #821
By arty@baboucha.com from United Kingdom

TWO NEW ADDITIONS TO THE PERIODIC TABLE OF ELEMENTS



Element Name: WOMANIUM

Symbol: WO

Atomic Weight: (don't even go there)



Physical properties: Generally soft and round in form. Boils at nothing and may freeze any time. Melts when treated properly. Very bitter if not used well.



Chemical properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Violent when left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green when placed next to a better specimen.



Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.



Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands!

Element Name: MANIUM

Symbol: XY

Atomic Weight: (180 +/ - 50)



Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.

Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with KD (Element: CHILDIUM) for prolonged period of time. Neuralize by saturating with alcohol.



Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good samples are able to

produce large quantities on command.



Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell




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7Search.com
The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
Self-Improvement :: #4110
By JWD from USA.

My Life
The road to success is not straight.

There is a curve called Failure,

A loop called Confusion,

Speed bumps called Friends,

Red lights called Enemies,

Caution lights called Family,

You will have flats called Jobs.

- JWD -

 
 
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