Pizza Ordering

Pizza Ordering

1. If using a touch-tone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask the
person taking the order to stop doing that.

2. Make up a charge-card name. Ask if they accept it.

3. Use CB lingo where applicable.

4. Order a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.

5. Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."

6. Tell the order taker a rival pizza place is on the other line and
you're going with the lowest bidder.

7. Tell them to put the crust on top this time.

8. Do not name the toppings you want. Rather, spell them out.

9. Change your accent every three seconds.

10. Ask what the order taker is wearing.

11. Order 52 pepperoni slices prepared in a fractal pattern as follows
from an equation you are about to dictate. Ask if they need paper.

12. Ask if you get to keep the pizza box. When they say yes, heave a
sigh of relief.

13. Have your pizza "shaken, not stirred."

14. Imitate the order taker's voice.

15. Belch directly into the mouthpiece; then tell your dog it should be
ashamed.

16. Order two toppings, then say, "No, they'll start fighting."

17. Call to complain about service. Later, call to say you were drunk
and didn't mean it.

18. Tell the order taker to tell the manager to tell his supervisor
he's fired.

19. When they repeat your order, say "Again, with a little more OOMPH
this time."

20. When they say "Will that be all?", snicker and say "We'll find out,
won't we?"

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