A Joke A Day - Funny everyday Jokes

Animal Jokes :: #161 By Tina Cook from USA. This guy needs a job and decides to apply at the zoo. As it happened, their star attraction, a gorilla, had passed away the night before and they had carefully preserved his hide. They tell this guy that they'll pay him well if he would dress up in the gorillas skin and pretend to be the gorilla so people will keep coming to the zoo. Well, the guy has his doubts, but Hey! He needs the money, so he puts on the skin and goes out into the cage. The people all cheer to see him. He plays up to the audience and they just eat it up. This isn't so bad, he thinks, and he starts really putting on a show, jumping around, beating his chest and roaring, swinging around. During one acrobatic attempt, though, he loses his balance and crashes through some safety netting, landing square in the middle of the lion cage! As he lies there stunned, the lion roars. He's terrified and starts screaming, "Help, Help, Help!" The lion races over to him, places his paws on his chest and hisses, "Shut up or we'll BOTH lose our jobs!" Forward this joke to your friends >>     Highly Recommended Book         Comedy Comes Clean A hilarious collection of wholesome jokes, quotes, and one-linears. Over 140 pages of laugh-out-loud humor on everything from family like to job jokes to sports stories to pet problems. Funny book for the entire family!     Health :: #5899 By Anonymous from USA. Working outdoors on hot days? Heatstroke is the most severe type of heat exhaustion, often resulting from exercise or heavy exertion in hot environments combined with inadequate fluid intake. When working in the heat, heed the warning signs of heat exhaustion and get out of the heat before a serious problem develops. What makes heatstroke severe and potentially life-threatening is that the body's normal mechanisms for dealing with heat stress, such as sweating, aren't working properly. Take these steps to reduce your risk of heat-related injury if you work outdoors in hot weather. Wear loose-fitting, lightweight, light-colored clothing. Drink plenty of fluids, even if you are not thirsty. A good rule of thumb is to drink two to four 8-ounce glasses of cool fluids each hour. Avoid drinking alcohol or sugary drinks. Rest frequently in a cool spot. If possible, work with a buddy so that you can monitor each other for signs and symptoms of heat exhaustion, such as heavy sweating or a rapid pulse. If you have those problems, it's time to stop and cool down. Signs and symptoms of heatstroke, the most serious kind of heat exhaustion includes: High body temperature, generally more than 104º F, Cessation of sweating, Rapid and shallow breathing, Irritability, confusion or unconsciousness, Rapid heart rate and pulse. If you notice such signs or symptoms, get the person into a cool place and call your local emergency number -Mayo Clinic-     aJokeADay.com - www.ajokeaday.com 4179 W Irving Park Rd, Chicago, IL 60641 1995-2008 © All rights reserved. Unsubscribe from aJokeADay.com sent to dailyjokes@inspiredgfx.com