Joke of the day - The Cabdriver and the Nun

ABS Peanuts - 4th place won $12 An old lady offers a bus driver some peanuts. So the driver happily eats them. Every 5 minutes she hands him another handful of peanuts. Driver: "Why don't you eat them yourself?" Old Lady: "I can't chew look I have no teeth." Driver: "Then why do you buy them?" Old lady: "I just love the chocolates around them." Submitted by Mcclearin Share This Joke

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The Cabdriver and the Nun - 3rd place won $15 A cabbie picks up a nun. She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring. He replies, "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you." She answers, "My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive." "Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me." She responds, "Well, lets see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be Catholic." The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I'm single and Catholic!" "OK" the nun says, "Pull into the next alley." The nun fulfills his fantasy with a kiss that would make anyone blush. When they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying. "My dear child," says the nun, "why are you crying?" "Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm not a catholic." The nun says, "That's OK My name is Gary and I'm going to a Halloween party." Submitted by HENNE Share This Joke

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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com How to keep your knife in good shape - #6035 It's very important to always maintain a sharp knife. Sharpen it after each use. Never use knives as a lever. Be sure to put your knife back in its sheath if you are not using it. It is recommended to fit a cord to the knife's lanyard hole so you don't lose it. Do not use your knife as a skewer. Never heat the knife unless you want to weaken the blades. To prevent your knife from being dull always remember to wash it.

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