After Bill Clinton receives the bill for Chelsea's wedding, he has a
heart attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is
waiting for him.
"I don't know what to do here," says the devil. "You are on my list,
but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll
tell you what I'm going to do. I've got a couple folks here who weren't
quite as bad as you.
I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll even
let you decide who leaves."
Clinton thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the first
room. In it was Ted Kennedy and a large pool of water. He kept diving
in and surfacing empty handed. Over and over and over. Such was his
fate in hell.
"No," Bill said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer and I don't
think I could do that all day long."
The devil led him to the next room. In it was Newt Gingrich with a
sledgehammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that
hammer, time after time after time.
"No, I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant
agony if all I could do was break rocks all day," commented Bill.
The devil opened a third door. In it, Clinton saw Jesse Jackson, lying
on the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in
a spread eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she
does best.
Clinton took this in in disbelief and finally said, "Yea, I can handle
this."
The devil smiled and said, "OK, Monica, you're free to go!"
And that my friends, is called justice!
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